I'm sitting in my office now pretty much cleared quite a fair bit of paper work this morning with tons more to complete later. Haven't blogged in a couple of days because I suppose my life is as uninteresting as it can be.

Part of my job scope is to do media clippings and therefore, I have been reading a lot of newspapers. Each day as I browse through the papers, I feel for the people who have lost their homes, their loved ones, their belongings because of some natural disaster or disaster that could have been avoided. It's really sad. Like yesterday's paper had this picture of a old man who was looking at the remains of his house after it had been struck by a tornado. He was crying and at that moment, I knew I was going to start crying too. I cannot imagine being in their situation because I will never experience this here in Singapore. Maybe for once, all of us should stop complaining about our situations because there are others out there who are worse than us.

Also because I spend so much time in my office and each time I take a break, my mind wonders. It's been pretty much a tough few days as my mind somehow treads back to memories, events, words that I don't really want to remember. It hasn't been easy because each time that happens, the mood is ruined for the entire day and I can't seem to work. Much as I try to tune my head to not go there, it's hard to control. It doesn't help that Michael Buble is on repeat on my computer because I can't technically store much music in my computer and sometimes it just triggers. It's a good thing somehow that each time I feel a crying episode coming, a colleague would just walk into the office and hence, I don't start.

I always pray that this is because I'm being hormonal and not because I don't want to let go of all my ugly, hurtful past. I should really embrace the way things are now that I don't have any obligation to anyone besides my parents and God. Silently, my heart still pines for someone I guess. If it's any consolation, I'm grateful for friends who are around me.

It's a long and bumpy road when one tries to move on from anything that had hindered him/her especially when it concerns the affairs of the heart. Sometimes I only have myself to blame for letting things fall through because of my insecurities; for not seizing opportunities that would propel me to being a better person than I already am; for letting people go because I am so unsure of myself.

How Can You Mend A Broken Heart
Bee Gees

I can think of younger days

When living for my life

Was everything a man could want to do

I could never see tomorrow

But I was never told about the sorrow

And how can you mend a broken heart?

How can you stop the rain from falling down?

How can you stop the sun from shining?

What makes the world go round?

How can you mend a this broken man?

How can a loser ever win?

Please help me mend my broken heart

And let me live again

I can still feel the breeze

That rustles through the trees

And misty memories of days gone by

We could never see tomorrow

No one said a word about the sorrow

And how can you mend a broken heart?

How can you stop the rain from falling down?

How can you stop the sun from shining?

What makes the world go round?

How can you mend this broken man?

How can a loser ever win?

Please help me mend my broken heart

And let me live again